…when it seems like it’s raining constantly and you think the sky looks grey, even if it might actually be sunny and crisp.
…when you feel cold and shivery, no matter how many jumpers and wooly socks you put on and even if the sun is on your back.
…when you feel flat, deflated, worn-out.
…when you look at your beautiful baby girl and she giggles and you smile and you forget for a split second, but then you remember, and you slump.
…when you wish that everyone would stop just getting on and busy-ing around, and be sad with you, because it feels right that they should be sad alongside you.
…when your mind operates on a loop system, reflecting over and over again on the things that you’re preoccupied with and you can’t focus or concentrate on anything else no matter how you try.
…when you feel like all your energy must be channelled into focusing on the very thing that is making you sad, as if trying to process what’s happening can only be done by giving it your undivided attention, shutting out all other things.
…when all you want to do is sleep, but it is the very thing that you can not.
Today I have felt sad like this.